Meditation during a time of personal crisis

In 2016 I left a job without having one lined up.  I knew what I was doing was a huge risk, but I was so miserable, I didn’t care. Meditation during a personal crisis became a tool I relied on heavily. What I didn’t realize was that it would take me a long time to figure out what I was doing and what excited me.  As we ascend on our spiritual journey, is the new midlife crisis trying to rise above the noise and darkness of a material world? What was initially about my career gave me time to understand myself and help me strip away aspects of my life that no longer served me. 

Creating Routine

I created a schedule for myself so I wouldn’t get too complacent. I rise around the same time every day, have a few outfits at the ready to be presentable should the doorbell ring and to walk my dog. My new normal is walking Abby at the same time every day, online classes, writing and socializing with friends on weekends. 

During that time I would look at job listings, nothing appealed to me and every entrepreneurial venture I pursued didn’t work. The funny thing is I finally found a job I thought I would like, then 9 months later I was laid off and was back to square one. The universe did me a favor because I didn’t want to be trapped in another corporate job which is what I was doing.

Anxiety Sets In 

Of course, in the middle of my personal crisis, I started having problems with anxiety and insomnia which I never experienced before. My family (including my furbabies), my home and meditation brought me comfort. My home is not only my shelter, but my sanctuary. I overlook a wooded area, a creek and walk my dog on the trail that surrounds the community.  I’ve always loved my home, but I came to love it more during this stressful time. 

Meditation During A Personal Crisis

I started meditating around 15 years ago but I didn’t know it’s what I was doing. Before going to bed I found it helpful to wash my day away in silence for a short time. I stopped and restarted many times over, but remained consistent at the practice about 8 years ago. There are great resources online and generally show up when you need them. I’ve discovered practitioners through the years, some I stayed with and some I moved on from.

There are wonderful meditation apps that contributed to where I focus my energy next. I personally use Insight Timer, but there are also Headspace, Calm and Relax Melodies, which are also great options. I used Relax Melodies to help me fall asleep when I was in the thick of anxiety and insomnia. There are so many soothing sounds to choose from. There are free services and also subscription services within each of the apps. 

The first thing people usually say to me when I mention meditation is, “my mind always races.” That is common and it’s okay. I recommend doing guided meditations to start with. If there is a particular issue you are having in your life, there is a meditation to help. Most teachers will tell you to get into the practice of doing it in the morning after you wake up. While that is my habit now, just starting is a step in the right direction. Whether it’s 5 minutes or an hour, get into the habit. Some days I do 15 minutes and some I go for an hour. 

You’ll be guided to where you should go next. If there is a meditation that speaks to you, you’re being guided. If you have a dream that stays with you, it’s probably trying to tell you something. Once you start recognizing signs, they will continue to show up. I still have anxiety from time to time, but I’m so thankful for meditation keeping the episodes to a minimum.  

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